I always wondered what it felt like to be fat. At some point in my life being fat was my ultimate goal. I still remember when I was five, I'll wear double clothings underneath my school uniform just to look like the other chubby kids in class, lol, but little did I know that my exposed tiny legs and arms told the world what a pretty little liar I was. I had to stop padding when the bullies of the class took note and had the best time of their little lives making fun of me. But oh well, I was just a kid, I wasn't so desperate.
Growing up, the love for chubby looks never really died. It got worse when camera phones became a thing to have, I couldn't stand seeing myself when I took pictures. I always felt like the thinnest girl in the world. Even my boyfriend then hoped I'd add some flesh some day. lol. It wasn't like it was so bad but everyone around me just effortlessly grew chubby. I tried different tricks in the book. I tried taking pills and portions but it never worked. My friends looked older than me and my juniors looked like my seniors so I had to make an extra effort to act mature. Infact I was going down the depression lane because people made fun of me for being so skinny, I became very sensitive and quiet defensive with endless cases of insecurity. The whole world watched their weight. I wanted to know what it felt like to watch my weight. The more I craved for that chubby look, the more my clothes remained my size. Mtchew!
Years went by and I slowly outgrew the crave for chubby looks. The turn around started when chubby girls wanted to trim up. Chubby girls admired my flat tummy and they invested time and money to have what I almost lost. It was now the other way round. Chubby girls felt more attractive with the slimmer look. Lol. I didn't even know how I was supposed to feel. I now began to wonder why I went through all that trouble to try and gain the weight most people are rejecting now.
Lord knows what will be the next body size trend. But all I know is I'm a happy girl. Free from the shackles of body size depression. I'm not as skinny anymore and I'm far from chubby. My point is, thin, chubby, tall or short we are all beautiful the way we are. But if that beauty doesn't start from within us, the world won't see it too.
Lol funny
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